November 5, 2018 -- You Know Better Than I
Beautiful People!
One of the best parts about serving a mission is watching Christ orchestrate your life perfectly so that your testimony can grow in very specific ways. Often, He sends you people or places that are exactly what you need to change your weaknesses into strengths. Especially when you didn't even realize that you had a weakness. Every trial teaches us something new- what a crazy concept! Lol!
This week, I have realized that God is helping me to work on one of my weaknesses- having faith that God's plan is better than my own. If you know me at all, you'll know that I have had the same life plan for basically as long as I can remember. I wrote it when I was in Kindergarten, and the only thing that has really changed is that I was able to go on my mission at 19 instead of 21. Since coming on my mission, that life plan has gone haywire! I have changed my major, my plans for a future career, and even my thoughts on where I would like to live when I graduate college.
I realized this week that I did the same thing with my mission. Though I never wrote it down, I have had this idea in my head of how the work will go in each area, and how long I will stay there, and the people that I will meet there. I can tell you for a fact, getting transferred to Alabama (for the first time!) for the last 6 weeks of my mission was not a part of that plan. I wanted to be in an area that I knew everyone and the work that was going on, because I thought that that would be the way to have the most effective and fulfilling final moments as a missionary. So getting put somewhere that I couldn't even drive you to Walmart if I needed to made me feel like I wasn't being the missionary God needed me to be. Like maybe all the growing and changing that I had done on my mission up to this point was for nothing, because I am just as clueless now as I was when I went to Madison in May of last year.
I should never have doubted in the things that I have learned though. God has given me growth, and when God gives you a gift, it's because He is going to help you use it. Over the last 17 months, God has given me (among many other things) a deep and abiding love for the scriptures and the ability to do Family History work effectively, both things have lead to miracles in this area this week. I know that they were only possible because God has been preparing me to serve here in Daleville since the moment I first put on a nametag. He has always known that I would come here; it has always been a part of His plan. Because of His plan, we have found a really amazing service opportunity at a Genealogical Society, started teaching a woman whose main concern is that she wants to discuss the scriptures in depth and analyze them, and made a connection with a lady who has been coming to church for 20 years. She has finally decided to get baptized, and though I won't be here for the actual baptism (it will be in December) she wants to do all the lessons with me before I leave.
This week was also my very last Zone Conference, and I was reminded, once again, that we are not sent here on Earth to only suffer- we are sent here to become something. President Smith told us that instead of asking God how He feels about what we are doing, we should ask God how He feels about who we are becoming. That really hit home to me, especially at this point in my mission. Of course God cares about what we do, but He mostly cares about who we are. We are meant to be good, not just do good things.
This area has been difficult, but I know that coming here has helped me on my journey to becoming something more than I was. I am so glad that I am not the person that I used to be! I know that God has prepared me to help the work go forward in this area for the short time that I will be here. I know that God has a plan, and it will always be greater than my own. I am incredibly grateful that I don't have to rely on just my own judgement and ideas, because I know that they are flawed and imperfect. God knows better than I, and that is the greatest blessing in the world!
Never give up, friends. There is something out there waiting for you, and God is the one who is sending it your way. I was going to attach pictures from this week, but a bunch of us missionaries are going to go to the National Peanut Festival today, and so I am just going to send an email later with all of the pictures from today in it. So look out for that! Talk to y'all again soon.
Remember how much God loves you. He has a plan for you too! If you trust in that, you will never be led astray. Much love y'all, and don't forget to read the Book of Mormon!
One of the best parts about serving a mission is watching Christ orchestrate your life perfectly so that your testimony can grow in very specific ways. Often, He sends you people or places that are exactly what you need to change your weaknesses into strengths. Especially when you didn't even realize that you had a weakness. Every trial teaches us something new- what a crazy concept! Lol!
This week, I have realized that God is helping me to work on one of my weaknesses- having faith that God's plan is better than my own. If you know me at all, you'll know that I have had the same life plan for basically as long as I can remember. I wrote it when I was in Kindergarten, and the only thing that has really changed is that I was able to go on my mission at 19 instead of 21. Since coming on my mission, that life plan has gone haywire! I have changed my major, my plans for a future career, and even my thoughts on where I would like to live when I graduate college.
I realized this week that I did the same thing with my mission. Though I never wrote it down, I have had this idea in my head of how the work will go in each area, and how long I will stay there, and the people that I will meet there. I can tell you for a fact, getting transferred to Alabama (for the first time!) for the last 6 weeks of my mission was not a part of that plan. I wanted to be in an area that I knew everyone and the work that was going on, because I thought that that would be the way to have the most effective and fulfilling final moments as a missionary. So getting put somewhere that I couldn't even drive you to Walmart if I needed to made me feel like I wasn't being the missionary God needed me to be. Like maybe all the growing and changing that I had done on my mission up to this point was for nothing, because I am just as clueless now as I was when I went to Madison in May of last year.
I should never have doubted in the things that I have learned though. God has given me growth, and when God gives you a gift, it's because He is going to help you use it. Over the last 17 months, God has given me (among many other things) a deep and abiding love for the scriptures and the ability to do Family History work effectively, both things have lead to miracles in this area this week. I know that they were only possible because God has been preparing me to serve here in Daleville since the moment I first put on a nametag. He has always known that I would come here; it has always been a part of His plan. Because of His plan, we have found a really amazing service opportunity at a Genealogical Society, started teaching a woman whose main concern is that she wants to discuss the scriptures in depth and analyze them, and made a connection with a lady who has been coming to church for 20 years. She has finally decided to get baptized, and though I won't be here for the actual baptism (it will be in December) she wants to do all the lessons with me before I leave.
This week was also my very last Zone Conference, and I was reminded, once again, that we are not sent here on Earth to only suffer- we are sent here to become something. President Smith told us that instead of asking God how He feels about what we are doing, we should ask God how He feels about who we are becoming. That really hit home to me, especially at this point in my mission. Of course God cares about what we do, but He mostly cares about who we are. We are meant to be good, not just do good things.
This area has been difficult, but I know that coming here has helped me on my journey to becoming something more than I was. I am so glad that I am not the person that I used to be! I know that God has prepared me to help the work go forward in this area for the short time that I will be here. I know that God has a plan, and it will always be greater than my own. I am incredibly grateful that I don't have to rely on just my own judgement and ideas, because I know that they are flawed and imperfect. God knows better than I, and that is the greatest blessing in the world!
Never give up, friends. There is something out there waiting for you, and God is the one who is sending it your way. I was going to attach pictures from this week, but a bunch of us missionaries are going to go to the National Peanut Festival today, and so I am just going to send an email later with all of the pictures from today in it. So look out for that! Talk to y'all again soon.
Remember how much God loves you. He has a plan for you too! If you trust in that, you will never be led astray. Much love y'all, and don't forget to read the Book of Mormon!
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